Day 20 - Looking Up

31 Days

toward

Abundant Life

If this is your first day here you may want to read here first

Day 20 - Keeping our Eyes fixed on Jesus

 From the end of the earth I will cry to You, When my heart is overwhelmed; 
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
Psalm 61:2

Last night as I lay in my bed I was overcome with foreboding thoughts.  I can't really place my finger on any one thought, it was just more like a feeling of impending doom.  It's an old familiar place for me to be and It's a place I dread going.  Where before my daily trials were bearable they now threatened to overtake.  It's like all of a sudden my whole world had become engulfed in a deep darkness.  I went to bed that way and even though I prayed I woke up with the same foreboding feelings.  Then add to it a gloomy day and well I just wanted to crawl back in bed and pull the covers over my head. 

I know that in part the change in my outlook is due to hormonal changes (PMS) that are going on in the inside.  I also know that when you add a tragic event that happened close to home, into the mix of all the normal daily fears and anxieties that a mom of six kids (ages 7-26) can be overcome by, it's a sure recipe for the fear and foreboding I was and still am trying to shake.  Yes!  I am still trying to shake it!  And so honestly I don't feel worthy to even blog about our abundant life in Christ today since I'm not feeling like I'm living it in this moment.  However, since I'm committed to blog for thirty-one days and I'm committed to being real with you! I am just being real with you!!!  Some days are just hard! 

However,  that does not mean that I am content to stay in this place.  Nor does it mean that I excuse it away because I'm hormonal.  Absolutely not!  What it does mean is that I am all the more intentional about looking at Christ instead of my circumstances or fears.  It means that I turn on the praise music and sing at the top of my lungs to Him (it is a sweet sweet sound to Him...though anyone nearby would plug their ears at the sound of it) and lift my arms up high and maybe even dance (even at the risk of looking like a fool...you should try it sometime).  Yes!  Ladies, I did say dance.  Did you know that David danced before the Lord and not only that but he danced "with all his might" (2 Samuel 6:14)?  Praise music helps me to take my eyes off me and put them back on Christ!  Dancing helps lift my spirit!  I don't wait until I feel like it, I do it even though I don't!  Then before I know it my spirit is lifted up.  So praising the Lord and dancing is one way that lifts me up out of my funk.  Another way is to ask myself:  "Am I thinking on what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8)?"  This is not a one time deal and then all is good (though I wish it were).  Nope, instead I do this again and again every time a fearful or anxious thought returns.

Ladies, I am praying that you and I can trust and rest in the knowledge that God Is doing a transforming work in us, because He is, and He has promised to complete it!  Meanwhile I rejoice that someday in heaven you and I will have a perfected mind!  This world is not our home.  Jesus is in heaven preparing our home for us and someday when we are there we will clearly understand what we now see only in part!

"For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now 

I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known."

1 Corinthians 13:12

In case your interested here is part of one of the songs that I meditated on today:

The Lord is
By Sovereign Grace

 VERSE 1
The depths of Your grace who can measure
You fully supply all I need
You restore my weary soul again and again
And lead me in Your righteousness and peace

VERSE 2
You’re with me through every dark valley
There’s nothing that I have to fear
You are there to comfort me again and again
Protecting me, assuring me You’re near


© 2008 Sovereign Grace Worship (ASCAP)/Sovereign Grace Praise (BMI)

 Below this post is a YouTube video of Phil Wickman and his song "Mystery".  I herd this song on Pandora as I was writing this blog and wanted to share it with you gals as well.